What Drives Your Life ?

Just started reading Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren


Looking back at the year,

I really wanna thank God for everything he has put forward for me.

• Joined BB

• Went for 30 Hour Famine

• Planet Shakers

• R & R Camp

• 1st PJ YEC

• Vacation Bible School
  
  
  
  
  Learnt so many things
  
  Especially in BB,
  
  Really Really Thank God for helping me in this decision ,
  
  this life-changing decision on joining BB
  
  
  
  I guess my one and only new year's resolution for 2007 would be
  
  Putting God FIRST in all that I do
  
  
  
  

Without God, life has no purpose, and without purpose,

life has no meaning.

Without meaning, life has no significance or hope.




The greatest tragedy is not death, but life without purpose.





Hope is as essential to your life as air and water.

You need hope to cope!

Those with a deep sense of life are the ones most likely to survive.

Hope comes from having a purpose.

So......

What Is Your purpose in Life for 2007?




Life Changers

Life Changers

This marks my 60th post !


It's been a great time @ Planet Shakers tonight

a-plenty new songs, more of which had wonderful meanings


Jesus

Beautiful Savior

God of All Majesty

Risen King


Lamb of God

Holy and Righteous

Blessed Reedeemer

Bright Morning Star


How Wonderful How Beautiful

Name above every name

Exalted High


Truly indeed ! perfectly describes my one and only King, Jesus


I asked God to show me what my light in his path for me

I asked him, what should be my

tuition and music centre be named

After a great time of worship, tonight on the 13th December,

God spoke to me


Life Changers


What a great name indeed !

This would be a name that would impact lives forever

As my vision in this hope of mine, is to

create a centre for learning and music



A tuition centre at sunrise, a music centre at sundown

From this, I would guide young kids to music

From this, I would lead them to know the true meaning of life

To know and discover my best Friend, Jesus Christ

To live for him every second and to have the courage

to speak up for Him



That's the challenge that God had set onto me

And that's the challenge that I'm going to embark on

Let my heart be broken,

by the things that break the heart of God

It's not the End that Matters

Just got back some of my final results today.. guess what i got?

.


.


.


.


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49 - Add Maths


59 - Physics


70 - Biology


And I'm proud of it? Why u may ask?


1. I've gained a best buddie who've been mentoring and tutoring me, haha and out of nowhere


I began to enjoy Physics!


Thanks Chris Chia! Will be praying for ya SPM =P




2. Reflecting back on they way i spent my time studying,


tutoring helped alot and being tutored helped too.


Those times mean more than results!





3. Knowing that there are support out there,


Knowing that there is still hope next year,


Am working hard to strive and acheive a better learning method

( not results )





I believe that it ain't results that matter the most,



It's the method u used to acheive those results



In other words, times spent learning with others is 100 X more meaningful


than getting that sheet of paper that states numbers, whether in red or black





What I'm trying to say is, whenever that 5th year in your secondary school life comes,

Do not get overstressed by those sheets of paper,


Cherish the time u spend learning, being with friends, learning MORE about them



That's what truly matters







My Quote:

It's not the end of the road that matters,

but the journey to the end...

My Greatest Experience by Far..

Moon Cake Festival 2006

Whoah! It’s finally over *tears of joy* =D

First and foremost, I would like to thank the Chinese Society for helping us, for their full support and efforts. Especially, MS FOH for the best suggestion and guidance throughout this project.

this project started since the day i went to penang for the st. anne's feast.. suddenly the idea of having a moon cake festival come forth, and thus my major fund-raising and school service project for the year ^^'

Through these past few months, I learnt a lot especially about myself

I learnt:

- How to deal with irritating and annoying people who will just drive you up the wall

- How to irritate them back =P and make them feel the same way

- How to cook myself in a stuffy room for 3 long hours with these monkeys

- How to ignore the ranking of a person (sounds bad but yeah, just had to) because their ideas are just plain stupid

- How to argue your way through just to get things straight

- How to be patient and explain a million times to get a simple message like this is the layout of the security ~.~ , imagine me in every meeting for the past 2 months

- how to explain in so many creative ideas just to get the message thru
from drawing diagrams to using my voice level, the degree of loudness etc. etc.

ok that was actually all negative things that i learnt =D,
now for the positive side

I learnt:

- That my LEO Members are a bunch of committed members, sometimes over-committed too. =) Thank you so much to those who massaged me, destressed me in times of trouble, those who followed me around during the final week before the project no matter how troublesome it was. Thank you guys! You know who you are =)

- How to ignore irritating people, learning to accept that they just wont listen to you no matter how hard you plead or beg

- I learnt that they aren’t the only one in the world and that others may also be capable of doing what they can do


- That some things just won’t go your way and I learnt how to twist and turn and yet reach my destination

- That some people just love to poke negative comments for the fact of bringing you down, maybe out of jealousy perhaps?

- how to deal with stress! i finally managed it =)

- To appreciate my poor little stomach when it starts howling and grumbling, I did not have a proper evening meal and no dinner at all during the event and had no supper and breakfast after that. By the time lunch came, gastric came forth and thus my stomach thought me a lesson * wonders how to survive the coming 30-hour famine camp *

- What it felt like to have gastric

- to stick up for yourself, to be stubborn *yes it does help * and stick to ideas that you already planned and thought of the consequences to it

- To appreciate God more, thanked Him so much that the weather was awesome that night. He was always there during times that I needed endurance.
* especially during meetings, …. get my drift? =D *

- to appreciate my parents more, I finally understand that it’s not through verbal that they support me, but it’s through their actions that they do
* will not elaborate any further due to sensitive issues * =P

acknowledgements:

- All my LEO members for your utmost dedication, without you guys I do not think that that night could ever have happened. Thank you for sticking up to our club eventho u know, all those negative remarks from *others* , i appreciate it till i wanted to burst into tears during the night of the project seeing that the event is actually brought into reality

- thank you for bearing with my absentee of blogging due to the fact that i was super bz during the past 2 months, organizing this project and tutoring my friends for pmr too

- My faithful BODs and my trusted friends too, going out to KOK CHUN, ALEX, YUVANES, KOK HAN, ARAVINTHAN, WINSTON, and EUGENE for staying with me to the very end =) Thank you for your sacrifice but please GET BACK ON YOUR STUDIES! xD

- Teachers and everyone who really had touched my heart and supported me – Pn. Han, Pn. Teh, Pn. Ong, Mr. Raj, Pn. Sushila, Ms. FOH and individuals who have helped me throughout my project

- Julian and Richard for helping me with the designing of the badges eventho you guys had PMR =)

- Not forgetting John Thomas too for all the time spent on my flyers =) and Paul Levigne for taking snapshots!

- **CHINESE SOCIETY for agreeing to join the project with me**

- Those who came that night! Sorry for not being able to greet you guys as i was just soo busy

- Everyone else whom I missed out. So Sorry! YOU for reading this post of mine that is just plain text.. xD

*************

PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT !

* My decision to be a teacher in the near future is FINAL *

* Pn. Han is retiring on the 19th of October, to those who know her, please do contact the school for more information *

My Parents are just..

I dunno, I think i'm becoming more like the kid in I Not Stupid Too, (the rich kid) whose parents don't understand him.. the situation I'm in now, it's just going on from worse to worst.

It's more of as if I don't get the support I want from them, sorry la but this post going to be abit the emo, well, I'm feeling very frustrated and this sad sobz is in me right now. In my current teen life, I'm holding two major posts and I'm involved in a lot of stuff. Namely, Prefects - Asst. Head, Leo - Secretary, Boys Brigade - Member, Church - Worship Team and I love to go for outings that I can gain at least some knowledge.

But what support do I get from my parents? I dunno maybe I just don't feel the support IF they are giving me any at all. When I do something that I'm really committed in, I just go all out to acheive what I want? Ok, maybe I neglect some stuff in the process.. But WHY can't they (my parents) understand about my commitment? Why can't they think of it in my shoes? A typical teenager going through the toughest challenge in life - CHANGE.

They say I'm getting over-committed, for example, today I am having an Impromptu Speech Test for my Communications Badge but at the freaking same time I have to attend my great grandma's bday in Malacca just to give "face", that Impromptu Test will gain me 5% if I perform. And as you guys know already, I go all out to do something that I want. So my dad came today to pick me up early to go to Malaccca, I told him that my Test haven't end, he insisted on going and going, but what's the point? We're already ending up getting there late, why can't wait just for another 5 minutes more? He still insisted, I had to give in in order to not cause an arguement between me and him, oh boy, you do not wanna hear me argue.

Thankfully, my officer agreed to allow me to take the impromptu next week. The sacrifice I had to make to go to a stupid bday party, leaving a bad impression of myself on my officer and not being able to learn from my fellow classmates mistakes. I dunno how that would cost me next week.

A few weeks ago, I challenged my dad saying that " What IF I want to be a pastor? ", the next 5 days, on and on about he went about pastoring being a bad thing, low salary, waste of talent and loads more of crap. At the end of the 5 days, I told him that I just wanted to see his reaction. Wanted to see whether his heart has changed to finally accept the fact that I would go all out to ignite the flame in me to serve the one and only God. When can he finally understand? I dunno, maybe the way I approached him is wrong.. All i need now is advice.. I need some guidance.. Been waiting so long for something to happen, but oh well, his heart is still a heart of stone. Dear God, please help me... oh and btw, dad's a free thinker

Now I'm off to Malacca to show my "face" there, please pray for me that I can bear with my parents, I dunno how long i can stand with them, without their support, I dunno what I can do now, but thankfully I have my true Father's support, up there in heaven. Please pray that my parents too finally change and experience my shoes. Thanks for reading this emo post of mine and please advice me... =(

A never ending realm of Guilt...

Dammit! I'm just feeling sooo emotionally drained today. I disappointed my very own pet brother, badly. Din manage to say my last goodbye to my best kindy teacher. What else? A super idiotic re-election of BOD meeting that basically screwed my mood for the day. How's that for a recipe of Guilt?

And now to add 1000 teaspoon of SALT to the already salted meal. I greatly feel like stabbing myself. The feeling of guilt just overpowers me. What can I do? Saying sorry don't mean a thing. So what if he forgives me if I can't forgive my very ownself of this day. This just sucks, being in the wrong, Guilt Guilt Guilt!

Fortunately, there's something to be happy about. My beloved Teacher Molly Fu which I lovingly call Ms. Fu, is now in heaven, praising God! Let me just share abit about her here, she's been a teacher, or shall i say a guide towards the light, the light of salvation. For without her laying the foundation of faith in me, I guess i'll never be writing this post, forever in search of the truth of life.

Ms. Molly Fu, an angel of salvation at Jack & Jill Kindergarden, off Jln Gasing, has been faithfully serving over the past 37 years! She started teaching at the age of 20+. Even with all the financial constraints and better job offers, she never gave up hope in this ministry. She chose the right path and over the 37 years she has impacted soooooo many lives, lives that would be lost without her guidance during those "important years".

Personally, Ms. Fu wasn't just my teacher only, she was also my second mother. Even after 7 years, she still remembers me clearly. As from what I heard from her friends and the testimony shared, she fondly remembers the names of her students, students which she deeply treasures and love. One quality that teachers today are losing. She would even go the extra mile by visiting those who can't catch up in school, those who are sick too.

Her sudden death caused by the lack of oxygen entering ther arteries in her heart, caused her her last breathe. Now with her gone, all those sweet memories, memories which i will treasure forever had even caused me to hallucinate by imagining her with me, right beside me, comforting me, and even walking that road that she once took to give tuition to my neighbour. Oh, those memories.. *I almost cried*

During her final hours, guess what she was doing? She was preparing herself to go to school. You know where school is for her? roughly 30/20km away. She moved to Ampang Jaya for I dunno how many years already just to look after her sister's kids. The love for children was the one that moved her on to do all this. The Love for God too. Every morning without fail, she would get up as early as 5.30am to get herself ready to go for school. Coming all the way to Petaling Jaya just to teach the little children. She surely is an angel sent from heaven.

Her last weeks was filled with pain and suffering, she overworked herself and ended up losing alot of weight which resulted in a worser health condition. And I still did not counted in the fact that she is diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetis which she secretly hidden throughout the years from her family and friends. Her compassionate heart which did not want to burden ANYONE, was the one that made everyone cry during her wake service last night.

Aunt Molly passed away in her toilet, on the morning of 12 June with a Bible held in her hands. We are all sure that she's in heaven now with God as she had already faithfully completed her duty as a messenger of Christ. Even with her early departure, I'm comforted to know that I'll soon see her in heaven. The thought of that really comforts me, which reminds me of her special voice which i still can remember till this very day. Nowonder people say that teachers are the greatest people in Life.

A final word to Ms. Fu, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE TOWARDS THE UPBRINGING OF LITTLE ME. I hope you'll know this, i mean I Know for sure that you know this too. The wake service really made me shed my tears, seeing all her students coming to pay their last respects touched me. As Pastr. Isaak Yim asked all the students to just rise. I could feeel her presence there. *cries*.

I would like to end this lengthy testimony from me with this sentence wrote by her niece to Ms. Fu :

-I'm so happy that you are now in heaven, rejoicing with the Lord as certainly he has taken you away as He needs you to teach all the little angels in heaven-

Thank you Ms. Fu ...

-------------------

And now, a little confession that I would like to make:

Kenneth Hiew, at 1.05 AM would tearfully apologize to Ms. Fu for not greeting her during the final weeks.

But another even sadder case would be this:

I'm So SORRY KA KIT!

Thank you for forgiving me, but I'll never forget this day, I'll never forgive myself of what I've done. Those very few words u said, really pierce through my heart. True to what people say, Words give a more painful death than bloodshed. Those last sentences you said, "thank you for everything you've done", really felt as if a thousand knives went through my body.

I know that I've greatly disappointed you, even saying sorry would not help as I know I've failed. Failed as a brother, moreover being the BIGGER brother that's supposed to think wiser, act wiser and not FAIL. Guess I just qualified for all the above stated.

I've never felt this guilty before in my entire life. Not even yelling at my mom last time, THIS is just so depressing to be thought about. I guess I won't be sleeping tonight. I know what I shall do, think over my actions and reminisce of the old days with Ms. Fu.

I'll understand and not blame you if you wouldn't want to talk to me anymore, or come over to my house this Friday. Thank you for giving me all these joy, the happiness that I've once lost and you've gained it back for me. The reason of me being a brother to you was because I wanted to be like you, always smiling, always filled with joy. And now as I'm slowly developing those wonderful traits from you, BUT I guess I just destroyed myself again, I made you feel so disappointed on ME and just so sad. I'll miss you alot..

I guess, Kenneth Hiew has died today, 14/06/06.